How To Grow By Understanding Love And Fear

Whether its the smallest single cell organism, a plant, an animal or a human being, life can’t be in both a state of growth and protection at the same time.

Why is this important?

It’s a principle of life.

It’s the same principle in the context of love and fear. We could also look at it in terms of opening and closing, or connection and disconnection.

Love, opening and connection, are states of growth, where we feel joyful, vibrant, expansive and alive.

On the other hand, fear, closing and disconnection are states of protection, where we feel constricted, small and possibly a victim to life.

This is not just an abstract idea, but something we can feel inside us. This is important, because it means we can apply this principle to our life to deepen self awareness, grow, connect to our heart and each other.

It starts with sensitivity.

We can observe how this principle of life unfolds through us by becoming sensitive to it.

By using your superpower of sensitivity, pay attention to how you feel in different situations and in different moods. The key is to feel the qualities of the sensations in your body – open/closed, relaxed/tense, calm/unsettled, soft/hard, expansive/contracted etc.

Notice when there’s grasping, tension, discomfort or unsettledness in your body and energy. It might be subtle, or it might be very intense. Naming the emotion can be helpful, but most importantly, connect your conscious awareness to these sensations and feelings, and recognize this tension and grasping as a state of protection.

Then be aware of the contrasting experience when you feel a sense of relaxation, opening, well-being and peacefulness. Make the conscious connection that this is a state of growth. It feels quite different to the experience of protection.

Growth feels alive! It feels like anything is possible. We feel open and connected.

Protection often feels stagnant and as if nothing is possible. We can feel closed, disconnected, and isolated from others.

A growth state for any living organism is when life is in alignment with the flow of creation… and we are part of life and creation – Love.

A protection state is disconnected from the flow of creation – Fear.

Remember not to judge yourself for being in one state or another, just allow yourself to observe and be sensitive to the subtle feelings in your energy. We don’t have to label our state as good or bad, right or wrong, this is about becoming consciously aware of the impact of these states.

Notice what emotions are present when you feel a state of growth, and then notice what emotions are present when you feel in a state of protection. Notice how much love or fear you feel, and how connected or disconnected you feel to yourself and others relative to your emotions.

Learn and grow through your inner exploration.

Emotions, feelings and states of mind are simply energy in different forms. When they’re unconscious there’s not much we can do about it, and they tend to have their way with us and influence our actions and choices. But when we make them conscious, we change our relationship to our emotions and fears, and gain greater capacity for opening, connection and love.

That doesn’t mean it’s always easy to choose love, but it does mean we can grow towards greater love because we’re more conscious of what’s happening inside us.

Understanding how the states of growth and protection feel inside us, helps us deepen our relationship to love… because we become more familiar with this principle of life feels inside us.

The more consciously aware we are of this principle the more capacity we have to shift from grasping to letting go, from closing to opening, from disconnection to connection, from protection to growth, and ultimately from fear to love.

Other useful tips


Meditation is a very useful practice that helps us quiet that usual and familiar noise of non-stop thoughts and stories in our mind. This is important because it’s the emotions, reactions and dramas of our mind that put us into a state of grasping, tension, disconnection and protection.

The practice of meditation is essentially teaching us how to shift into a state of opening, love, connection and growth.

Be curious!

An attitude of curiosity and wonder can also be very helpful.

You’re an explorer on a journey of self-discovery!… There are forces of creation at play inside you and becoming consciously sensitive to them brings awakening and greater capacity to navigate your inner landscapes towards our heart… and then greater capacity to shine your heart into the world.

And the world needs your heart to shine!

The Peacekeeper Project offers training and education to help you quiet your busy mind, so you can live from your heart.

To get started with meditation and learn the Peacekeeper Project’s Heart Space Meditation, you can gain access to a Free Course here.

If you’re ready to dive in and live from your heart, then Finding Stillness is a comprehensive 21 Day Meditation and Mindfulness Online Course that will teach you how to quiet your busy mind so you can live from the heart.

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